WHAT IS TANTRIC SEX?
The basic meaning of tantric sex is “the weaving and expansion of energy”. It is a Hindu technique that has been used for 5,000 years to bring people together so they can experience sex slowly and build a deeper connection with each other. This connection extends to their mind and body and often allows for more intense orgasms.
Tantric sex is like a slow-cooked meal that has marinated in all of the seasonings. This meal would be nowhere near as good if it had been cooked quickly.
Tantric sex, or more commonly, tantra, can be learned by anyone who would like to build a stronger connection with their partner.
WHY SHOULD YOU TRY TANTRA?
Slowing down sex allows you to connect deeper to the event and your partner. You can truly learn all of the areas of your body that most intensely connect with your mind. The slower you go, the better you can immerse yourself in the experience and learn more about your partner’s touch. Like other endeavors, with tantra you get to choose how much effort you put into your sexual encounters. Not only that, but as you slow down the proceedings you may find that you are able to last longer and control your orgasms better.
Unlike many activities in your life, tantric sex isn’t focused on goals, so you can learn at your own pace. It is an excellent way to connect with your partner and you can improve by small increments. When you feel intense trust with your partner, you can allow yourself to release and enjoy all of the benefits of this unrushed and sensual sex.
If you have a female partner, tantric sex is even better as it takes the pressure off of both of you to reach orgasm. As women more often orgasm from clitoral stimulation, tantric sex may really boost their pleasure as it focuses on foreplay. Rather than focusing on just the genitals, tantric sex allows you to concentrate on building the connection through sensual touch.
With tantra sex, you will learn that making love can include much more than just penetration. That that may be an aspect, but it won’t be the only barometer of your sexual prowess.
HOW TO BEGIN THE ADVENTURE OF TANTRIC SEX?
You may have heard someone mention tantric sex, but beyond the words, you may not know much about this practice. Tantric sex involves rituals that are intended to blend the masculine and feminine energies, though it isn’t restricted to heterosexual relationships. During tantra, all of the areas, including your emotional, spiritual, physical, and mental states are stimulated as much as possible in order to boost the pleasure and connectedness with your partner.
To get started, you can try the following techniques:
TURN DOWN THE LIGHTS
To create a pleasant and safe space you may want to start your tantric practices by turning down the lights and closing your world so only the two of you exist. This intimate environment can help both of you relax so you can slowly increase the connection between the two of you.
Before starting any activities, you will want to ensure your body is in its most relaxed state. Louise Van Der Velde, an expert, recommends shaking your limbs intensely in order to unblock any stress in your system and energize your body.
DO NOT GET ON THE BED
Your bed is a place of sleep. While it can also be used for sex, its ultimate function is to allow for rest. If you begin your tantra activities on the bed you will trigger your sleep mode, says Van Der Velde. This can lead to quick sex as you prepare to sleep, rather than the long and sensuous sessions that can strengthen your connection with each other.
GET VERY COMFORTABLE
After you have resolved to not use the bed, you and your partner may try laying on the floor next to each other. When you are relaxed, slowly explore each other’s bodies with lingering touches that allow the both of you to savor the sensation of each other.
EXPERIMENT WITH TOUCH
Try a variety of different touches, such as a firm massage, light touch, and/or very gentle stroking. Each touch will elicit different reactions in you or your partner. Going slow and altering the touch can allow you and your partner to prolong the sexual excitement. You can build each other to your climax and then bring each other back down. This can increase the length of your sexual relations and pleasure as both of you edge each other.
FOCUS ON YOUR BREATHING
If your mind loses focus on the moment, set your attention to your breathing. To increase the connection between you and your partner, you can inhale as your partner exhales. This can help the two of you sync your breath and you may feel as if you are sharing one breath.
If you are unable to keep this connection for less than 10 minutes, try again. Tantric sex may be counterintuitive to your usual sexual activities. With our fast-paced society that focuses on the goal, it may be hard to slow down, savor each other, and not have a definitive ending time. Tantric sex is about staying in the present.
If you bring up tantric sex and your partner will not consider this “strange and mystical” practice, tell your partner it is like yoga or meditation. Many people follow tantra because of the sex tips and not the mysticism.
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